Lucy Beaumont tells how her mother was diagnosed with many disparate neurological conditions during the lockdown, but time has allowed her to see why she figured out certain things so difficult.
Photo: © Ashley Mayle)
With all the talk of the Partygate report and the Sue Gray report this week, it feels like a time to reflect on the past two years and how Covid, the lockdown, and a return to the new normal have affected each of us differently.
There is no doubt that what happened in tenth place in those troubled times was a mistake.
But when I look at the pandemic, for the first time now I can see what my family and I have gained from it.
During lockdown, my mother, who is 65, was diagnosed with high-functioning Aspergers syndrome, ADHD, and alexithymia.
You may have never heard of the latter condition, which affects how emotions are expressed and processed, but about 1 in 10 people have been reported to have it.
SOPA/LightRocket Images via Getty Images
© Ashley Mayle)
The diagnosis only came because the world has slowed down.
The lockdown allowed me and my mom to reflect on how she struggles in certain situations – and how she excels in others.
More and more women in particular are being diagnosed with BD later in life, with celebrities like Kristen McGuinness and Melanie Sykes speaking out frankly in recent months.
And sometimes just a diagnosis is enough to start understanding yourself.
For my mom, guilt, inadequacy, and sometimes appearing rude or misbehaving meant that life was a serpentine.
Barcroft Media via Getty Images)
These feelings were replaced by the sensation of living outside a survival mode.
I immediately turned to the Internet to find guidance and support for myself, as an adult child of autistic parents.
My mother cares very much about me and protects me, if she is very sympathetic to anything.
It must have been difficult for her as a single parent.
We’ve been through a lot, past in the past, but the diagnosis stirred up a lot of emotional feelings for me.
I feel that I have more advantages than disadvantages as a child of a mother with Asperger’s syndrome but children can feel neglected or have to act like parents.
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There may be “no filter” comments and a parent may need “vices” as a crutch to ease their pain.
Our story is unique to us and is not a commentary on others and their abilities to be nerve-wracking and parenting.
But it would be great to see a dramatic change in this area and child support, along with reducing NHS waiting times for a diagnosis.
If only someone could sit down with my eight-year-old self to explain to me why my mom found life so difficult and that it wasn’t my fault.
Oh my gosh, hope the support gets better.
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